First, a story about Maw Maw (my grandmother in Kentucky). My mom wrote this up on her blog, and since my patience is short today, I’m just going to copy and paste from her.

Meg and I were watching a movie the other night when the phone rings. I pick it up and say hello. With out a hello or anything, I hear my mother in law saying, “I’m so mad at my cat! Do you know what she did to me?” She then starts telling me about about a new stray cat that has been hanging around her house and Anna and Carmen decided to feed it and now the stray keeps coming back. Ever since this happened her beloved pet kitty has started wandering off during the day and only comes home to eat. I said to my MIL, “Yeah, cats like to go off and find things to chase.”
MIL, “well I’m mad at her. She’s doing this to hurt me she never wandered off before.”
Me, (and at this point I’m laughing at my MIL,) “Shes a cat, thats what they do.”
MIL, “Well if shes going to be that way I’m not going to feed her anymore. She can’t run off like that and then come back only to eat.”
Me, “Its a CAT! You have to feen her.”
MIL, “No I don’t. I’m hurt.”
Me,”It’s a CAT!”
At this point my sides hurt from laughing at her, because she seriously thinks this cat is out to hurt her feelings.
MIL, ” Well I just wanted to call because I had to tell some one how mad I was.”
Me, “Okay, bye. But, feed your cat.”
MIL, “We’ll see.”
Thirty minutes later the phone rings. Meg answers, and its my MIL. With out a hello, she says, “The cats back.” Megan replies, “You’re going to feed it aren’t you?”
MIL, (Big sigh,) “well…I guess so. Bye”

And now, a random out-of-the-blue quote from Gram:

“Megan, never ever get on a boat alone with a man…..unless you’re a good swimmer and can get out of there FAST.”